Do you find your spouse annoying? The coronavirus pandemic has pushed many of us to quarantine with our partners longer than one can imagine. As much as we love spending time with them, being in the same house together 24/7 with nothing new to look forward to can make us easily irritated as time goes by.
Did your spouse's habitual patterns -- quirks you once found charming -- suddenly become irritating? Does the morning hum provoke you? Does the repeated finger taps seem impossible to ignore?
While we figure out how to function as a career person, a parent, and a spouse simultaneously, we also experience a lot of stress trying to move through the same rooms with the same people every day. Even the most stable relationships can go under a rough time after weeks of close confinement. The forced solitude can make couples feel suffocated, wanting personal space or some "alone" time but finding none.
What do you do when you can no longer tolerate an annoying spouse? Here’s what you can do to remain calm and composed at an uneasy time like this.
How to Deal With Annoying Spouse
The enemy is stress, not your spouse.
If you find yourself getting all worked up because of your spouse's now annoying habits, remember that the enemy is not your spouse. Stress is. It is natural to become easily triggered during stressful times like this due to a lack of emotional resources. Because we cannot meet our friends and have nowhere else to unwind, we tend to be more delicate and less resilient these days.
Before you pick on your annoying spouse, ask yourself where your feelings are truly coming from. Don't forget that we are all under a stressful time and that we will turn to different coping mechanisms to get by. It is important to be kind to yourself and your loved one now more than ever.
Have empathy and compromise.
We have different ways of managing emotional distress. For instance, one spouse may want emotional support from their other half, while the other may prefer to dismiss the stress and plow on with their day.
The things your spouse does that you now find annoying can be their way of coping with anxiety. By opening up a conversation, you are inviting your spouse to involve you in their process of dealing with stress. Be careful not to criticize. When you talk about it, you both guide and support each other in these trying times.
The next time your spouse taps the table nervously, you can hold their hand and let them know that you are there for them.
Couples who do not work on their schedules will find themselves pretty much bothered about anything. Husbands and wives need to be intentional about establishing a new routine at home if they want to get the tasks done, especially if they already have kids.
Aside from work-related activities, schedule time for exercise, skincare, and other personal activities for “me” time. You must have your own thing going on, a way to invest in yourself. Create a new structure that will help you and your partner move around with much more freedom and less pressure.
Plan a regular date night at home.
Quarantine is not a reason to delay date nights with your spouse until it's safe to go out again. Remember, husbands and wives are romantic partners and not just housemates. You and your partner can get cranky around each other if you don't give romance proper attention.
Once in a while, get out of your sweatpants and put some effort into looking good for your spouse. Dress up occasionally and surprise your partner with a romantic night at home!
Even if we don’t know how long we’ll be isolated in our homes, know that we will not stay this way forever. In the meantime, there are ways you can make date nights at home fun and exciting for you and your spouse.
Date Night Salsa: Annoying spouse no more!
No more annoying times! Bring back the spark in your relationship with Salsa dancing. Date Night Salsa is a dance course made to revive couples’ intimacy and help them connect physically through dance. The program is perfect even for first time salsa dancers!